Who pays for the cost of your wedding can be a tough topic to talk about.
And while there are traditions, there are no absolute rules on who pays for the wedding, let’s just say that there are commonly used guidelines for who pays for the cost of the wedding and all of the varied expenses.
Normally, the majority of the wedding is paid for by the brides’ family. But because of today’s increasing costs of weddings, these traditional obligations will usually depend on the circumstance or the situation.
You need to have a real discussion with your spouse to be and your individual families. If they are expected to contribute financially then you need to give them a chance to review their financial situation and then to allow them the space to say Yes, No, or Maybe.
Money is a hard topic to bring up and if done wrong, you may find yourself scraping for every penny because you’ve just alienated the people that might have been able to help with a scaled back version of your dream wedding.
Being realistic has to outweigh your desire to impress your friends and followers on social media.
You need to be honest with yourself and your partner about what you can afford. You also need to be honest with your parents, siblings, in-laws and friends who may be contributing financially or emotionally. If they are willing to help then great! But if not, then don’t make them feel bad about it by making a big deal out of their lack of support.
Now, on to the good stuff… Who Pays for What:
These are guidelines and aren’t chiseled in stone. Every person, every family have their own expectations and traditions. More and more couples are opting for smaller and smaller wedding s with bigger and more memorable receptions. There is also a trend to be frugal when it comes to the actual wedding so that they have a better chance of a financially healthy life together.
Now… on to the to the good stuff… Who pays for what!
The Bride Pays For:
• The wedding ring for the groom
• A wedding gift for the groom
• Gifts for the bridal attendants
• Accommodations for out of town guests
The Groom Pays For:
• The Engagement ring and Wedding Rings
• A gift for the bride
• Gifts for the best man and ushers
• Grooms attire (tux rental, etc..)
• Bride’s bouquet and going-away corsage
• Mothers’ corsage
• Boutonnieres for attendants and fathers
• Marriage license
• Clergyman’s or Officiant’s Fee
• The honeymoon expenses
• Bachelor’s dinner (if not already given by best man)
The Bride’s Family Pays For:
• Engagement party
• Ceremony costs: location, rental, music, plus related expenses
• Entire cost of reception: food, beverages, entertainment, rental
items, decorations, wedding cake
• Bridal Gown and accessories
• A wedding gift for the couple
• Wedding invitations, announcements, and mailing costs
• Bridesmaid’s bouquets
• Transportation for bridal party from the bride’s home to the
ceremony
• Bridesmaid’s luncheon
• Photography (groom’s parents might pay for the pictures they
want)
• Their Personal Wedding Attire
• Floral decorations
The Groom’s Family Pays For:
• The Rehearsal Dinner
• Their Wedding Attire
• Travel and accommodations for the groom’s family
• Wedding gifts for the bride and the groom
The Attendants Pay For:
• Their Wedding attire
• Travel expenses
• Gifts for the bride and groom
• The Wedding Shower thrown by Maid of Honor
• The Bachelor Party is the responsibility of the Best Man or ushers
That’s a pretty impressive list of wedding expenses and costs, but don’t believe for a moment that it is all inclusive. Most of those bullet points can have several smaller bullet points. So make your own list using ours as general suggestions and be sure to add and subtract and shift the costs from one person to another as long as you get their full buy-in.
And most of all, enjoy yourselves. It’s your big day, which will lead to many more big days in your married life.
No go out there and get married!